You Know You're Getting Old When:

* Your favorite shows are now airing on Nick at Night!
* Your idol as a kid is now dead!
* You were a kid and asked what a 8 track was and now you're being laughed at when you talk about cassettes and albums!
* A 5th grader really is smarter than you, so you watch the show to prove them wrong!
* You finally make it on the show Survivor and their is a 92% chance you'll be voted off first for being the oldest!
* When you watch the Bachelor and know you're his perfect match but you're too old for the show! (I see Cougarville in my future...shhh, don't tell my husband)
* You have to scoot forward and use your arms to help yourself off the chair or couch!
* Having sex you choose to be on the bottom to look younger, oppose to having your face fall on your partner! (try it with a mirror ladies...it's frightening!)
* The slogan "Help, I've fallen and I can't get up" turns into "Help, my boobs have fallen and they wont bounce back up!"
*You've owned the same dog for 35 yrs! (snoopy 1, snoopy 2, snoopy 3, etc....)
*You've colored your hair so many times, even you don't know what color it really is!
*You get to the grocery store and realize your wearing your sleepers!
*You're out with a girlfriend and her kids shopping and you get mistaken for their grandmother!
*You go to the club and they don't want to see your I.D. card
*You have to purchase a Monday-Friday medicine pill box because you can't remember if you took your meds that day!
*Activia yogurt has become a daily regiment for you!
*Taking a daily nap is a schedule event!
*You got a part-time job and the manager is younger than you are!
*Your waiter asks if you would like to see the Senior's Menu!
*You buy your first Moo-Moo because it makes you look skinny! (plus you can be naked underneath it)
*You think the hottest actor of today is old enough to be your kid! or you could be arrested for statutory rape!
*Your dog stops following you around the house because he's even given up on where you're going!
*You have developed spelling dyslexia when you type now!
*Writing a blog is about the only way you're going to make new friends!
*You have to call your parents to check just to make sure they're still alive!
*You use chocolate as a replacement for estrogen!
*Your closet contains every era of fashion (60's, 70's, 80's, 90's etc...)!
*You know you're one day closer to death's door not the lottery!
*That whisker on your chin now has a friend!
*You finally realize you've been in a Mid-Life Crisis for the last 20 years!
*You start searching on eBay for a Tennis Ball Machine cause you can't throw the ball far enough for your dog!
*Your dog's breath is better than yours in the morning now!
*Your only hope for grandchildren is that your dog will have a litter!
*When Kathy Griffin is now on your A-List! (She's so God Damn Funny!)
*A brain fart is actually now a small aneurysm!
*Short term memory loss is your excuse now for everything you forgot to do that day!

Trust me I can think of ones all day long....LOL .....I'll add more daily as I think of them!